Diocese first to offer adoption assistance
By Erick Rommel
Head Staff Writer
When Jean-Marie Dimech-Juchniewicz rocks her nine-month-old son John to sleep, she sings him a verse of Amazing Grace before laying him in his crib. This small scene in the life of a soon-to-be-toddler is one that was a long time coming for Jean-Marie and her husband, also named John.
Although a doctor told them in February 2004 that they could not conceive a child, that did not mean they could not start a family. John and Jean-Marie immediately began looking at adoption as an alternative.
In vitro fertilization was not an option for the couple. The Catholic Church opposes IVF because children are created outside the martial act and it involves the creation of embryos that are either never brought to term or are destroyed.
While researching adoption options, John and Jean-Marie discovered a Web site which contains resources to promote adoption awareness. Included in the site’s materials was a guide for approaching employers about adding adoption benefits. Jean-Marie told Oratorian Father Peter R. Cebulka, director, The Catholic Center at Rutgers, where she worked as a chaplain, about the materials supplied by the foundation. He suggested she present a proposal to Eric Dill, diocesan director of Human Resources.
In March 2005, Jean-Marie met with Dill to introduce the concept and present information from her research. “Eric had a really positive response to it,” Jean-Marie recalled, not realizing that she had set in motion what is believed to be the first employee adoption assistance program offered by any Catholic Diocese in the United States.
In mid-April, during one of his regular meetings with Bishop Paul G. Bootkoski, Dill discussed the idea of establishing some form of assistance for employees who choose to adopt. “We spoke about the difficult decisions couples such as John and Jean-Marie face in following Church teachings, and the significant costs associated with adoption,” recalled Dill. “Bishop Paul was highly supportive, and said simply ‘Let’s do it.’ ”
Dill formed an Adoption Assistance Committee, which included Jean-Marie and a cross-section of diocesan leadership who work closely with families, including Daughter of Charity Sister Joanne Donovan, director, Maternity and Adoption, Catholic Charities; Judith A. Psota, director, Office of Family Life Ministry; Jennifer A. Ruggiero, director, Office of Pro-Life Activities; Tom Toolan, director, Office of Finance, and Suson Tillman, director, Human Resources, Catholic Charities.
“The whole time I was thinking, ‘Oh my God, they’re really going to do this,’” Jean-Marie recalled.
While the diocese was preparing its adoption assistance program, John and Jean-Marie were moving forward in their plans to adopt. In May 2004, they had submitted an application to Holt International Children’s Services, a Christian agency which was also the first international adoption agency in the United States.
John and Jean-Marie chose to adopt a child from South Korea partly because of her work with the Catholic Center. “The past four years, one of the groups I worked with was the Korean Catholic Community,” Jean-Marie recalled. “I fell in love with their culture and tradition.”
Thanks to the adoption assistance program she helped create, part of Jean-Marie and John’s adoption costs were paid as a sign of the diocese’s recognition of employees who adopt children.
A typical international adoption costs $35,000, on average.
The program is available to eligible employees who work for the diocese, its parishes and schools, and Catholic Charities. The plan provides reimbursement of up to $3,500 in adoption expenses ($4,500 for a child adopted from the sister Diocese of Santa Rosa, Guatemala), as well as up to four weeks of paid leave.
“Most employers who have an adoption program have either cost reimbursement or paid time off, not both,” Jean-Marie explained. “The diocese now has both, and it was great to get that support.”
“Members of the committee felt it was important to not only provide financial assistance, but also provide paid time-off so that employees could bond with a newly adopted child,” Dill explained.
The start date for the new plan is Nov. 21, the date of the diocese’s first Mass to Celebrate Adoption, which will take place at 7:30 p.m. in the St. John Neumann Pastoral Center, Piscataway. Bishop Bootkoski will be the primary celebrant.
The plan also retroactively covers eligible expenses that were incurred after Jan. 1, 2005.
John Seung-Kee Juchniewicz was born Jan. 10, 2005. John and Jean-Marie learned he was their son June 20. At the start of September, they were traveling to South Korea to bring him home.
They saw him for the first time when his foster mother peeked into a waiting room in the adoption agency’s office. “[His foster mother] peeked around the corner,” Jean-Marie recalled. “She saw us. We saw him. It was emotional.”
John and Jean-Marie spent three days learning about young John from his foster mother. While they do not know much about his birthparents, they know enough. “He gets three sets of people who love him,” Jean-Marie said, referring to her and her husband, her son’s foster mother, and his birthparents. “No one gives birth who doesn’t love their child.
“It’s scary how quickly you can fall in love with another human being,” Jean-Marie added.
“It’s the same thing everyone goes through,” John said. “You walk in the door and his face lights up. It’s the best feeling in the world.”
*The attached/referenced article was originally published in The Catholic Spirit, the official newspaper of the Diocese of Metuchen, and is protected under U.S. and international copyright law